Snake America Thirty-Two (Christmas)
Snake is a bi-weekly newsletter--though not this week, I'm on vacation--covering sold and for-sale second-market goods, generally on eBay. Subscribe.
This week, a gift guide for Christmas.
1. For the whole squad:
eBay: Refrigerator coat, lot of 10: I keep expecting to see more people wearing these, but I only saw one, the other week at the zine fair. The kid pulled it off, but the jacket looked a little stiff. (He didn't.) The only store in which I've seen these for sale was an all-purpose Carhartt-type store (like that crappy one in Greenpoint) in Montreal. That store was across the street from what may well be the only true vintage store in Canada. Stuff up there--there just isn't much of a secondary market. No one re-sells stuff. Unless it's roll-top desks or super-old garbage. Not sure why. Too much distance between cities, I guess. Anyways, size small is too small for me. No one knows how these fit, either. No one knows if anyone works in refrigerators anymore. I certainly don't.
2. For your own special sweetheart:
eBay: Keds canvas slip-on crested sneakers: These are great, and I wish they fit me. They're like Stubbs and Wootton slippers, but recall less Eton and more Afghanistan, around 1989. Not like they were worn with bloomers, but someone left them behind and then they were picked up and worn. I feel like these should be in a Steve Coll book. Maybe they were or have been? I am saying the following principals in Journalism School Dean Coll's tremendous works of non-fiction have worn these shoes, as follows--Massoud's teen henchmen in Ghost Wars (USA 2005), one of the oil executives' teen--or tween--daughters--or sons--in Private Empire (USA 2012), some kid using the payphone for the last time in Deal of the Century (USA 1986), etc. But really, with the dust here, they look Afghani. Or at least East-world bootleg(1). Recommended.
3. For a mortal enemy:
eBay: MCM dusty-ass red-metal credenza, $7K: I may have written about this before, but I've been watching this item for four years and it hasn't gotten a dollar cheaper, no offers. I'm not sure what Davis Allen is. I think he played for the Angels. I also think the original photo had the credenza with a copy of The New York Times dated on President Obama's first inauguration. Or it might have had an extra-long jewel-case CD resting atop it. Both scrubbed out. Every time I click on this auction the light is hitting this credenza a different way. I like the idea of asking for so much money that no one will pay for it--a feature of great vintage sellers everywhere. When someone in Wranglers doesn't want to take your money--they are better than you. It's also a great look on eBay, if you're at the mall and recognize someone's wabash barn coat from a $900 auction you're keeping an eye on. This Damon Allen credenza would be a great gift for your enemy, either because it's not for sale, and so you can't give it and your enemy gets stiffed on a Christmas gift, which is an unkind cut. Or you spend list price, out of spite and balls, and your enemy feels really guilty for making you go above-budget, and then diminished. You won, and all you did was spend money. Recommended.
4. For an aficionado:
eBay: Manila folder of various comix, price TBD: This is a highlight-reel folder, the kind I keep my bills in, of various Golden and Silver Age comix, artists varied, writer--I forget who wrote this. Answer coming New Year's. My intern showed me this auction, he's into this stuff. Hal Foster has a thing in here, the great art critic. If you Google Foster's name, he looks pretty athletic. Good haircut too, for an art critic at least. I wonder if what he wrote here is exclusive to this auction. That's not the best idea considering the ephemerality of these things--I barely know what's on sale in this auction, and am making other people aware through this, and so the ignorance grows from here--but it leaves questions: Why different artists? Why are the comics unbound? Who were these being shown to (an agent, a rival comix-publisher, someone from the pulp and paper industry)? Were they being shown to anyone? How'd the seller get these (who'd he murder?)? Who's going to win this and for how much? In what circumstances was the original owner murdered? What's Hal Foster's favorite She-Hulk (USA) storyline? Actually, wow, Hal Foster is the name of a guy who drew comix. Not the art critic in this case. I guess many of the comix here are his--as in of him. I can't get a handle on this stuff. I thought the art critic guy wrote something here since, well, stranger things have happened. But this is really a find. Screw free press, but this is why I like eBay: It's hard, of course, to come across one-off joints for purchase, like this, or salesman samples, etc. in stores. If they're good they sell. If you're looking for a one-off something to just look at--then they're in a museum maybe, where no one can get them. But on eBay it's both. What a country!
For someone flashy:
Quantum Dots: According to this week's New Yorker, quantum dots are "highly fluorescent nanoparticles used in medical imaging and plasma television screens." They "usually made [sic] in tiny amounts from toxic chemicals, such as cadmium selenide and indium arsenide." The retail price for quantum dots is exactly, according to The New Yorker, $1,000,000 per kilogram. This makes them officially The Ultimate Joint. (Previous titleholder was the city of Detroit, in a hypothetical situation, posed by a major Canadian news organization, asking whether Canada should buy it. Buying an entire city--with museums, quarries, utilities, etc.--is the ultimate act of tag-popping. It however no longer applies, with Detroit starting to exit bankruptcy.)
The idea of buying a kilogram of poison for a million dollars is why we get up in the morning. After saving up for a couple years, I may, with everything breaking right, buy a Nakashima headboard. Then some asshole will ruin my day getting a seven-figure bottle of poison to put on their mantle just to show off. The New Yorker article was--is--very good so far, but they say the days of $1,000,000 bottles may be numbered, since graphene, a very thin chalk or something, is on the come-up. Graphene makes for better highly flueorescent nanoparticles. I haven't finished reading the article. Yesterday, three people were reading the same issue on the same car on my ride home. Never seen that before. A bottle of promethazine goes for about $1,200. I used to think that was a lot. But by the time I get to the movie reviews and comix caption, I won't even bend down to pick one up.
Thanks for reading. Happy Holidays, and please subscribe.
Snake
(1) Please be assured this is not a joke but based off bootleg clothing I bought in East Jerusalem souks back when, IE, Levi's with pinstriped pockets, boating-designed Nike T-shirts, pan-theist unsoled house-shoe cotton-type slip-ons.